When i decided that starting a blog made sense in my life, i had to configure what was worth writing about. After an almost endless internal thought process, my passions started to become clear. It’s funny how aspects of your life stay with you. Friends certainly don’t, relationships for the most part fall by the wayside. Few things have been with me my entire life. The love of movies is one of them.
Being a young boy i remember the impact of movies and how the “larger than life” feel was a powerful one. My parents got divorced when i was a weird age. Not quite old enough to drive myself to and from at my will and certainly not young enough to be oblivious to what was happening around me. To the best of my knowledge, i coped with their divorce in many ways, one of the largest being film.
There i was, a 12 year old going from house to house with my backpack full of movies. While i had many friends at this period in my life, none of them were making the to’s and fro’s to my parent’s separate worlds. The love of film entered my life because a void needed to be filled. Picture a train going its normal speed but with no stops. Just a continuous ride. Thats how i felt. For whatever reason, movies gave me my stop. My train station if you will.
The films in that backpack started to become essential to me. No matter what my ever-changing life could throw, those films always were consistent in being present. Always there, always the same and to a 12 year old who’s life was always being altered, that was a big deal.
(While the titles changed sometimes randomly) the staples were always accounted for. Rear Window, Rope. Close Encounters of the Third kind, Vertigo among others. The characters in these films became my closest friends. No matter what i was going through, no matter what changed, no matter who entered and exited; these characters remained. There is something to be said about people in your life. Your “real friends” people say, are the ones that stick close through thick and thin. By definition then, mine were people i never met. Although they obviously will never know the role they played in my life, thankfully they were there when i needed them most.
Thinking back on those days, the emotions and results alike, i honestly can’t picture that time without film. One of my favorite aspects of movies is how they can be so, so personal to someone and nothing more than a mere 2 hours wasted in another’s life. The point is they reach. In that time in my life, i needed some reaching and was eager to reach back.
Film has impacting me to the extent of making my own. The words “The Fiction” will always be very special to me. I remember writing The Fiction and just the pure act of really writing a movie felt so close to home for me. I felt comfortable and familiar. When the decision to film came about, surprisingly i was even more comfortable. I won’t prolong this post on The Fiction as i suppose future posts will call “The Fiction” home, but to not mention it in this body of words would have been a serious crime Sam Spade certainly wouldn’t have allowed.
Done right or not, movies speak. We are all so different that movies align properly with whom they choose. They do all of us justice or a disservice. They point something out in your life or simply remind you of a past memory. They make you appreciate or repress. While the final verdict of a film differs between us all, we can all agree on one thing; movies touch us in our own unique ways. I know they did for me. Much like the characters i befriended long ago, film will never know my love for it. But that doesn’t mean i’ll stop reaching. More importantly it means movies will never stop reaching back for me. And ill be there.